From My Desk To Yours

Today’s post is a fun deviation from our usual content. Tomorrow is author Kathi Lipp’s self-designated, “National Clean Purse Day” and Denise (the trusty Ministry Coordinator for Fruitful Word Ministries) and I are joining in the fun. We thought you might like to clean out your purse, too, with Kathi’s easy system. She is the author of a series of project books that take a fun approach to a variety of topics important to women.

Kathi’s latest book in the series is titled, “The Get Yourself Organized Project” published by Harvest House Publishers. It is filled with tips to help you organize everything from the rooms in your home to your calendar. Kathi even includes tips for meal planning, which I probably should spend time studying, not just reading. Those who know me well know I don’t like to cook and I do it as little as possible. Thankfully, my family gives me grace, my husband likes to grill . . . and we eat out often! 

Here is information on Kathi’s new book:

The Get Yourself Organized Project

Finally, an organizational book for women who have given up trying to be Martha Stewart but still desire some semblance of order in their lives.

Most organizational books are written by and for people who are naturally structured and orderly. For the woman who is more ADD than type A, the advice sounds terrific but seldom works. These women are looking for help that takes into account their free-spirited outlook while providing tips and tricks they can easily follow to live a more organized life.

Kathi Lipp, author of The Husband Project and other “project” books, is just the author to address this need. In her inimitable style, she offers

• easy and effective ways women can restore peace to their everyday lives
• simple and manageable long-term solutions for organizing any room in one’s home (and keeping it that way)
• a realistic way to de-stress a busy schedule
• strategies for efficient shopping, meal preparation, cleaning, and more

Full of helpful tips and abundant good humor, The Get Yourself Organized Project is for those who want to spend their time living and enjoying life rather than organizing their sock drawer.

 The Get Yourself Organized Project or any of Kathi’s other project books, can be purchased from Barnes & Noble’s website.

So, is your purse looking a bit messy? Don’t feel alone. So did mine! Here is my purse before the big clean out:

And after…? All nice and tidy.

Would you like to join us for the National Clean Purse Day?

Here are Kathi’s easy to follow (and implement) instructions.  How to Clean Your Purse Instructions

Visit the Fruitful Word’s Facebook page at www.Facebook.com/fruitfulword and join the fun. You’ll find my photos and Denise’s there! Let us know you cleaned out your purse too!

And take a moment to post “I CLEANED OUT MY PURSE” on Kathi’s blog entitled
 National Clean Out Your Purse Day 

If you visit Kathi’s Facebook Author page www.Facebook.com/authorkathilipp and post about your Clean Purse Day experience by May 15^th, you will be entered to win a Vera Bradley tote filled with Kathi’s books. 

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Kathi Lipp is a busy conference and retreat speaker and the of The Husband Project: 21 Days to Loving Your Man—on Purpose and with a Plan, The Marriage Project: 21 Days to More Love and Laughter, and The Me Project: 21 Days to Living the Life You’ve Always Wanted and The “What’s for Dinner?” Solution. She is a frequent guest on Focus on the Family and dozens of other radio programs.

Church leaders and women’s ministry directors rely on Kathi to help women move from living out of obligation to enjoying godly passion. She speaks to thousands of women across the US and Canada every year.

Kathi and her husband, Roger, are the parents of four young adults and live in San Jose, California. Find out more about Kathi at www.kathilipp.com

Facilitating a small group Bible study can be intimidating, especially if you’ve never led a group discussion. But with healthy guidelines and some training, everyday challenging dynamics can be mastered with basic facilitating skills. However, you never quite know what scenarios will present themselves or what questions may come up and there are some situations even seasoned leaders feel ill-equipped to handle.

In today’s post, I want to make you aware of wonderful resource designed to handle just such situations. It is called the Emergency Response Handbook for Small Group Leaders, offered by Group Publishing.

Here is an excerpt from the back cover:

People face difficult, painful stuff in life—and they shouldn’t struggle alone. But what do you say? How do you help? What if you make things worse? The rapid-response handbook gives you and your small group the confidence to share God’s love and comfort with hurting friends.

Topics included in the handbook are:

• The Death of a Child
• The Death of a Spouse
• Depression
• Suicide
• Addiction
• Divorce
• Financial Crisis
• Unemployment
• Rebellious Child
• Terminal Illness
• Broken Fellowship
• Church Scandal

Each chapter covers one of the above subjects and includes: a sample scenario, care and counseling tips, scripture suggestions, ways your group can support the person, suggested books and online resources, sections labeled, “What Not to Say” and “What to Say”, and tips to help you know when to refer someone to a professional.

The handbooks sell for $14.99 and are available from Group Publishing.

Group also offers an Emergency Response Handbook specifically designed for Women’s Ministry.

I value and appreciate your comments. Please also share any additional resources you have come across to help leaders handle extraordinary circumstances.

“Why can’t I stay in the same group?” I get that question a couple times every year. Our Bible study structure includes small group discussion time. We place women in small groups when they register for fall Bible study and they remain in the same group for the spring session as well. Great friendships have developed in those groups, so it isn’t surprising women want to stay together.

However, each semester we pray and then randomly place women in groups. We don’t allow participants to request a certain group or pair up with a church friend. We mix everyone up. We even shuffle our leadership team, re-matching facilitators and co-facilitators each fall semester.  We make exceptions for participants who don’t attend our church by trying to place them in groups with people they know or with the person who invited them to the study. Accommodations are also made for members of the same family, such as a mother and daughter (some want to be in the same group, some do not). However, we ask most members to be flexible and trust God to place them in a small group. Over the years, I’ve seen example after example of scenarios where it is clear women were in groups together for a reason.

Change is uncomfortable. Every fall I have one or two women ask to be placed with a certain leader or in the same group as a friend from a previous semester. As difficult as it is to stick to the guidelines, we do it for the good of the ministry. So why do we insist on shuffling discussion groups each year?

1). Our women’s ministry is warmer and friendlier because of our guidelines. A woman is in a small group with about nine other women for eight months. As a result, she has the opportunity to really get to know the other members of the group. Participants pray together regularly, share insights from God’s Word, learn together and grow together.  Once a woman has attended our Bible study for a few years, she knows about 25-30 women well. When we return for Bible study each fall semester, new women feel the warmth that comes from those relationships. It is a welcoming atmosphere for everyone.

2). Women are more likely to return to Bible study when they feel connected to more women. They look forward to getting together with friends they haven’t seen in awhile. Because those friendships are built upon the foundation of study and spiritual growth, the relationships also serve as accountability and encourage real transformation. We spur one another on toward love and good deeds (Hebrews 10:24).

2). Newcomers feel more welcome when they attend a newly formed group. We naturally gravitate toward people with whom we are familiar and comfortable. When we only know a handful of people well, we tend to make a bee-line for our friends and avoid uncomfortable “small talk” with others.  By starting new groups each year, everyone starts fresh and new participants don’t feel out of place.

Do you shuffle your Bible study discussion groups? If so, please share any additional benefits or insights.

It happens to all of us sometimes. We get wrapped up in serving at our local church, excited about the work we see God doing and the programs we are implementing, and we become apathetic toward the millions of children living in poverty across the globe or the homeless struggling to survive on our inner-city streets.

1 John 3:16-18 says:

This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.  If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.

Service projects provide opportunities for the women (or men) in your church to love with action.  At Fairfield Baptist Church, our women’s bible study does some sort of service project at the end of each spring session. We’ve supported a crisis pregnancy center, an inner-city ministry, and this year we are supporting a home for single mothers and their children. Service projects help us gain a greater awareness of the great works God is doing beyond the walls of our church.

Below are a few tips for selecting a service project for your ministry:

1). Do your Homework: Research the organization you would like to support.  Make sure it is a Christ-centered facility whose mission and values align with the beliefs of your ministry or church.

2). Consider Your Limitations: Our women’s bible study group has a lot of children in on-campus childcare. For that reason, we aren’t able to leave the church grounds for our service projects. Therefore, we choose organizations we can support by doing our service on the church campus. For instance, we have prepared care packages to be taken to the residents at a local shelter. We’ve also donated, sorted, and ironed maternity clothes for use in a crisis pregnancy center. Keep your restrictions of time or resources in mind as you search for the right organization and project to fit your group.

 3). Share the Heart of an Organization: Show video clips with testimonials so women can see and hear how needs are being met through the organization. Some ministries will send a representative to speak to your group. Ask the speaker to share a couple testimonials about the work God is doing at their facility. Your women will become more enthusiastic about the project if they understand how their efforts will help impact lives.

What tips can you offer for organizing a successful service project?

As I’ve spoken at women’s events over the years, I’ve noticed each church (or women’s group) seems to have what I call a collective personality.  For instance, the women’s group at one church where I’ve had the privilege of teaching on several different occasions is comprised of women of a variety of ages and racial backgrounds. I’m blessed whenever I arrive at one of their events because they greet one another (and me!) with hugs and warm smiles. Their collective “personality” is friendly, loving, and accepting. They enjoy learning about God’s Word, but their joy comes from being together as a group of believers.

In contrast, I spoke at a retreat one time where the women seemed genuinely hungry for a better understanding of God’s Word.  They greeted me, helped me set up, and were friendly. But as soon as I stood up to speak, the group came to life. It seemed every woman in the room had her Bible open, pen in her hand, and was intently listening, ready to dig deep into the truths of Scripture (An indescribable blessing to this hungry Bible student, turned teacher).

Ah, and then there was the retreat where every teaching session was accompanied by a wonderful, home cooked meal topped off with lovingly decorated desserts, and warm, fresh coffee.  The women were relaxed, joyful, and gracious. Sharing food together as they studied and fellowshipped seemed to be a tradition. I experienced a distinct joy as I shared the Bread of Life (John 6:48) with this warm, hospitable group.

I believe a special blessing awaits the leader who identifies her ministry’s collective personality and adjusts her planning to meet the collective needs of her unique group.

No one was better at adapting the delivery of his message to fit his audience than the Apostle Paul. I’ll close with his words as recorded in 1 Corinthians 9:

To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God’s law but am under Christ’s law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some.  I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings. (vs.20-23 NIV)

 What is the personality of your women’s group? How have you adapted to meet the needs of your group and what was the result? Please share by posting a comment.

I came across today’s post as I was reading one of my favorite leadership blogs by Wayne Hastings. I asked him if he would be willing to adapt it for ministry leaders and share his insights with us. He graciously accepted my invitation.

Wayne shares strategies to help leaders “unleash greatness” in the people involved in our ministries.  By implementing these tips, I suspect you’ll discover a little greatness in yourself, as well.

9 Ways to Unleash Greatness in Others – By Wayne Hastings

A humble leader steps aside so that others can run by and seize the prize of their own greatness. What are some ways we can make this happen?

1. Assume the best of others. Leaders who expect the best of others exert a powerful influence. Many times leaders get caught in the trap of judging and thereby cutting off their people’s ability to soar. Expect the best. Find them doing things right.
2. Learn to listen. James 1:19 says, ”My dear brothers and sisters, be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.”  Being quick to listen implies that you are paying attention and actually hearing what your people are saying. Listen with the intent of understanding rather than responding.
3. Reward honest communication. Do you shoot the messenger? How do you receive bad news? Good leaders listen and reward honesty in their people. Sharp debate strengthens the team and the potential of the idea. Embrace it.
4. Admit your mistakes. Humble and open leaders show vulnerability. Saying, “I was wrong” is difficult to say, but it’s one of the most freeing and powerful statements a leader can make. It shows accountability and admitting your mistakes opens the door for your ministry’s team members to relax and admit their own mistakes. It all leads to team growth.
5. Commit to developing others. Take the time to know people, their temperaments and their strengths. Know their skills and put them in a position to use their strengths to maximize their performance. Greatness comes from not harping on weaknesses or forcing people to work outside their skill and strength.
6. Share the dream. Be open and regularly share your vision and goals. Don’t hide them under a basket or in your head. Sharing them with others on the team allows them to give you input and also gets them on board.
7. Seek commitment. Once people know and understand your goals and you begin to understand their needs and potential, you can then seek their commitment. Learn to draw a line between people who are “just interested” and those who are committed. Good leaders understand the need to develop committed people.
8. Set goals. Developing people’s potential (and then being open to their ideas) involves setting mutually agreed-upon goals. Follow up regularly to make sure they are meeting the standard and using their strengths to their fullest.
9. Reward and recognize. It is important to make people feel appreciated. Find them doing things right. Develop a reward system that helps people feel they have contributed.

Follow these nine suggestions and I guarantee you’ll grow, develop and unleash greatness in your ministry team members.

What are some ways you unleash greatness in your people?

Wayne Hastings is an independent consultant who works with publishers and ministries in product development, marketing and publishing strategies. He is also Resources Pastor at Grace Chapel, Leipers Fork, TN. Wayne is the author of several books and Bible study guides. His most recent are: Trust Me! Developing a Leadership Style People will Follow and David: A Guided Journal into the Life of a Man after God’s Own Heart. Wayne and his wife Pam live in Franklin, TN. Visit his blog at www.WayneHastings.com.

I have a confession to make. I thoroughly enjoy the television show, Undercover Boss.  Because Mark and I are business owners and also worked in corporate America for many years, I identify with the employees as well as the company bosses highlighted each week on the show. 

In last night’s episode, the president of a winery and vineyard went undercover in his company. One of the jobs the covert boss attempted was crop prediction at the company vineyard. In crop predicting, a work crew attempts to estimate a crop’s yield for a season by counting the number of flowers on the vines. Those flowers have the potential to eventually turn into grape clusters.  The process involves counting the number of clusters on sample vines and then averaging the totals. A company then multiplies that average by the estimated number of vines in their vineyard to come up with the season’s crop prediction.

Of course, I immediately thought of spiritual fruit when the process was explained.

Do you inspect your ministry team from time to time, searching for those flowering vines that are ripe with potential to bear fruit for the kingdom?  Do you take note when someone seems to have deep insights to share with your small group each week at Bible study? That’s a possible teaching gift in bloom. Do you encourage the woman who shows up early for meetings laying out inviting snacks on pretty plates with matching napkins? That’s a budding hospitality coordinator waiting to be discovered.  Or how about the quiet servant who offers to take attendance, copy handouts, or assist with the note-taking. Do you recognize the flowering administrative gift bringing a sense of calming order to your group with its soothing fragrance?

As believers in Christ, we all have the potential to bear fruit for God’s kingdom. Ministry leaders need to do a little crop predicting within our ministries. Nurture gifts. Encourage growth. Count a few flowers when they bloom on the vine. Pray for people involved in your ministry and ask God to give you spiritual eyes to recognize team members budding with the potential to bear fruit in your church or ministry.

For this reason, since the day we heard about you, we have not stopped praying for you and asking God to fill you with the knowledge of his will through all spiritual wisdom and understanding. And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God. –Colossians 1:9-10 NIV

Today I want to share a website I stumbled upon this week while I was brushing up on my small group leadership skills. I am thrilled with the resources offered on the site and I am excited to share it with you!

I highly recommend SmallGroups.com if you are involved in any type of ministry leadership. Whether you lead a small group bible study in your home, are responsible for training adult ministry leaders, or conduct regular meetings for your ministry, there are some great training materials and leadership resources available at SmallGroup.com.

The website offers a variety of handouts and downloads (many of which are free!) on subjects such as “Building Community” and “Creating an Atmosphere for Growth”. The “Train” section includes several free training handouts. You can even subscribe to a small group “digizine” in that section (Its free!).    

SmallGroup.com’s “Lead” section offers helpful resources for event planners like ice-breaker suggestions and hospitality helps. You’ll also find group dynamics tips, listed by topic. The website provides helpful articles on a variety of different topics and most of the materials can be used in adult, student, or children’s ministry settings.

There are three membership options available: A free registration (with limited resources available), a Leader Membership for $99 a year, and a Church Membership for $149 a year.  

www.SmallGroups.com  Provided by Christianity Today International.

It thrills me when I find helpful, fresh resources to help me serve Christ more effectively.  If you find this information helpful or know of another site offering great resources for women serving Christ in ministry, please share by posting a comment.

Enjoy serving!

What do you think of when you hear the word worship?  The verb is defined as, “to regard with ardent or adorning esteem or devotion”. The noun describes “the ceremonies, prayers, or other religious forms by which this love is expressed” (TheFreeDictionary.com)

I had an interesting experience while speaking at a women’s church retreat this past weekend and it brought the subject of effective worship to the forefront of my mind.  For whatever reason, the praise team the church had scheduled to lead the music for the retreat had to cancel at the last minute.  As soon as we were notified, Denise (Fruitful Word’s Ministry Coordinator) and I took a few minutes to pray for the leaders and women attending the retreat, trusting God would provide and guide the retreat coordinator.

Well, it was an amazing weekend. We didn’t have fancy sound equipment, power point slides, or instruments. We just gathered together as women seeking God through His Word.  A few brave women sang acapella to begin or end the sessions without rehearsals or more than a few brief minutes of preparation.  We dug into God’s Word, sought His presence, and everyone came together to sing to our Lord without concern for perfect pitch and we chuckled as women worked together to remember the right words. We shared wonderful moments of laughter and I even saw a few tears.  

For me, this experience served as a powerful illustration of the purpose and definition of worship.  Don’t misunderstand me. I appreciate the worship pastor at my church and I am thankful for the efforts, preparation, and the talent of the praise team. They bless me weekly and I am often drawn into intimate moments of sincere worship as we sing to our Lord.

But if you are involved in planning events this year, I encourage you to seek God about the possibility of stripping away all of the usual high-tech equipment and instruments sometime during the year. Perhaps you could try having a single person sing praise songs while strumming on an acoustical guitar by a camp fire . Or consider printing up song sheets and have your group sing acapella.

You may discover the change in routine and unexpected simplicity creates a sweet, intimate time of sincere, honest worship.

Jesus said, “God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and truth” –John 4:24 NIV.  

Today I thought I would re-post my favorite guest blog post from 2011. Not only do I think the information is helpful any time of year, but with many Bible studies starting up, I think the information will prove helpful (even if you’ve read it before).

Megan Moursund is the Ladies Bible Study Coordinator for Fairfield Baptist Church and a valued member of our Women’s Ministry Leadership team. I asked her to share some tips for handling challenging small group dynamics. Megan took a fun approach and I trust you’ll find her handout helpful. Enjoy her post:

Great Opportunities In Disguise

Joyful Judy has the gift of gab and is ready to SHARE what she has learned through her week of Bible study homework.  Bashful Beth avoids eye contact because she isn’t sure her answers are “right.”  Sweet, sleepy Sue is so worried about the child she left crying in child care that she can barely recall the name of the study!

The dynamics of a small group are as varied as the unique women God has brought together to compose the group itself.  Several challenges arise within a group: the dominant member, the quiet member, the member who concentrates on personal problems, the members who lock horns, and so on.  All these relational hiccups likely occur for the group members both in and outside of the small group meeting.

Such habits of interaction can be quite challenging to redirect, both in reference to others AND ourselves!  As Charles Swindoll writes, “We are all faced with a series of great opportunities, brilliantly disguised as unsolvable problems.  Unsolvable without God’s wisdom, that is.”

The facilitator’s task is to make the work of the group easier, to navigate the challenges that arise and so the group can become greater than the sum of its parts.  The facilitator will face problems and personalities that seem “unsolvable” at times.  But, with God’s wisdom, “challenges” can bring about a process of relational deepening.  A beautiful transformation begins that extends far beyond the small group room.

Seek God’s wisdom wholeheartedly when something feels a little “off” in your small group.  Don’t ignore the problem and miss out on a unique opportunity for growth! -Megan Moursund

Feel free to download a handout with tips for handling challenging dynamics by clicking the link below:

Challenging Issues[Megan Moursund]

Megan graduated with honors from St. Edward’s University in Austin, earning a Master of Arts in Counseling.  She also studied at Dallas Theological Seminary and earned a B.S. in Psychology from Texas A&M University.